“Given the increasing popularity of non-gendered or non-binary pronouns, will we soon be reading The Sydney Morning Theirald? Will intrepid climbers scale the Themalayas and schools teach Theystory?” asks George Manojlovic of Mangerton. “Perhaps I might be mxing the point.” Not sure about that, but Granny’s spellchecker has just internally haemorrhaged.
The cutlery (C8) contention continues, with John Greenway of Wentworth Falls delivering the next cut: “To really throw a spanner in the cutlery, we have a rather more comprehensive selection: left are the standard knives and forks, middle the spoons and salad forks, right the butter knives with the soup spoons. That’s for standard daily use; for solemn occasions, there are several drawers for ‘good’ cutlery, with about 10 different types of eating tools. Went overboard once!”
“All this talk of cutlery prompts me to ask if one can buy left-handed cake forks?” asks Chris Tracey of Worrowing Heights. “Further, the cutlery drawer in my kitchen stores horizontally. Oh dear, can someone please explain the layout for this?” Christine Haines of Baulkham Hills can: “Mine goes: spoons, forks, knives, from front to back.”
“Gosh! Fancy having an actual layout in a cutlery drawer,” says Sally Wroe of Castle Hill. “Organisation plus, plus. So 21st century!”
Warren McPherson of Kiama reckons Mike Fogarty (C8) has “nothing to be wary of there with the RN officer’s duffle coat in the CBD. He be off to his shanty singing group. It be the ones with the missing body parts, eye patch and bandana that you should be worried about. They be the bad buggers.”
You may be right, Charles Davies-Scourfield (C8), we may be running out of phone numbers. David Skillicorn of Kingston, Canada “went to top up my Aussie number ahead of visit to find that some kind person had just done it for me”. Peter Miniutti of Ashbury reassures that “in the US they only have 10 digits and in China, 11, so I think we’re safe for a while”.
“In Good Food, Jill Dupleix suggested a soft-boiled egg requires six minutes’ cooking, a jammy egg eight minutes and hard-boiled 10 minutes,” notes Christine Helby of Forbes. “Does anyone remember their childhood, when we only soft-boiled an egg for three minutes, or do I just think that’s what I remember? If my recollection is correct, what has happened to eggs to require the longer cooking time?”
Column8@smh.com.au
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